“Not to us, Yahweh, not to us, but to Your name be glory.” Psalm 115
As we begin 2026, we have now lived on the land for ten years. Ten years seems significant, a hefty milestone. During this time we have longed to build a home. We wanted to build soon after we moved out here, but the possibility of adopting a little boy changed our plans and we instead renovated and added on to the shanty farmhouse we were living in. When the adoption fell through, we began dreaming and planning to build a timber frame home, but after COVID came, our lumber supply dried up and we began to switch gears from building yet again. Soon after this, we were faced with another opportunity to adopt, this time a little girl. For the last four years, through countless emotional ups and downs, we have prayed that this child could finally come home. It was in the middle of our adoption saga that we realized that our home was full of mold and that it was finally time for us to build. So we moved into my in-laws’ house on our property so that we could build on the same site as the old house. We disassembled our old home piece by piece and my husband and sons are currently building a new home. In early September our daughter, Rachel finally came home! In October our oldest daughter, Adeline got engaged! There are so many very big things happening at once, that it is hard to hold them all in my heart.
It’s a strange thing to be on the other side of years and years of prayers. To be on the side of answered prayer. I guess I thought it would feel different. Like the crescendo of music at the end of a good movie or a victorious sense of accomplishment or triumph. But what I feel seems less like victory and more like hidden hard work. Some days I wake up in the morning and things feel so insignificant. I wonder if the work I do even matters. And other days -most days- I wake up feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. Life is hard right now. But it is also glorious, if I but have eyes to see it.
The word the Lord gave me for 2025 was glory. In Hebrew this word is “kabowd” and it literally means weight or heaviness. It is used to describe something of immense importance and value. When Paul used the phrase “the eternal weight of glory” in 2 Corinthians 4:17, he purposely combined the word weight with glory in order to contrast the “light and momentary affliction” we suffer in this world. The gravity of eternal glory far outweighs anything we may suffer on this earth. And though I may feel like we are suffering in not being in our own home right now or with all of the work that comes along with adopting a little girl from trauma, or with the health issues I have been dealing with, the reality is that these light and momentary troubles are achieving something far beyond what our minds can imagine.
Respite Ranch 